Abosede Rachel Oladayo – also known as “Boskylala” – is a 33-year old woman who discovered her HIV positive status in 2000. Today Bose is married and has two boys aged 14 and 7 months. Her husband and sons are all HIV negative. As a trained HIV Prevention & Care Counselor and a Programme Officer for Hope Worldwide Nigeria’s Orphans & Vulnerable Children (OVC) programme, Bose has traveled widely to countries including Kenya, Uganda, and South Africa to advocate for People Living With HIV & AIDS (PLWHA). She enjoys reading exploring, meeting people and asking questions. Bose also loves watching movies and traveling.

How did you find out you were HIV positive?

It’s amazing. That is the most wonderful thing that ever happened to me: knowing my HIV status. I’m the kind of person that loves exploring. I used to work in a private (medical laboratory) and I learned to carry out tests on people. And really to be candid with you, if you asked me then what HIV is, I didn’t know. I decided to test my own blood one fateful day - and behold, the result was positive. I didn’t tell anybody for over a year - I was just trying to read about HIV. I said I would do the test again some days after my birthday.  This time  I used  a different  method, because I told myself that  the test  strip I  first  used could be fake.  This time the results showed that I’m Type 1 positive.

Then I was dying silently – mentally, I was tormenting myself. I said to myself – “Bose, come, you can find a cure to this thing you’re just making noise about.” So I created a concoction including aloe vera gel, bleach, and TCP and was injecting it into my blood stream. The last time I injected myself I almost died. But I thank God my mum was alive then, probably the reason why she survived  her  1999 operation was just for me to live.

 Afterwards, I had a fight with one of my colleagues in the lab and I was suspended for two weeks. I was releasing my anger on anybody and I started hating myself.  Later, through attending church with my elder brother, I met Mr. Yemi Osilaja – the Executive Director of Hope Worldwide Nigeria – and that is where my journey to treatment, accepting myself and encouraging others living with HIV & AIDS began.

How did you get infected?

I can’t really say how I got infected - I’ve been exposed several ways – sexually, through occupational hazards, etc.  The only thing that I know is that I discovered my HIV status, and that is the most important thing. How I got infected doesn’t change anything – it doesn’t change the fact that I’m a person living with HIV (PLWH).

You recently had a baby who has tested negative for HIV. What steps did you take in Preventing Mother to Child Transmission (PMTCT) of HIV?

Like what a doctor will tell you, chances of prevention are not 100%. So I’ll say that the miracle is done by God. But a very high percentage of women that do PMTCT have children who are born negative.

So for somebody to have a successful PMTCT, the person needs to be on antiretroviral drugs (ARVs) so the viral load is at  an  undetectable level and the CD4  cell  count at  a  high level  (CD4 or T-cells are the cells that HIV attacks and uses to make more copies of HIV, thus weakening the immune system) . The person can also decide to have a vaginal delivery or a caesarean section. I had a free caesarean section - it’s free in federal hospitals for women living with HIV & AIDS, and the government also gives them infant formula support. This is a program run under the United States’ President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief (PEPFAR) program.  The pregnant woman also shouldn’t breastfeed – I was given infant formula support by MTN Foundation.

 At the hospital they tested my son at two months old and he’ll be going for another test soon. But with all the clinical appearances, he’s very healthy. His name is Marvelous - I thank God for his life. He’s a very smart baby, and hyperactive!

How about your relationship with your husband? Did you find out you were HIV positive before or after you were married?

Before I got married. Four years ago, I met Niyi in a bus.  When we met again, I told him my whole life history, except I didn’t include HIV.  But then something said, “You are a public person - if you tell him, what difference does it make from other people you’ve been telling?”

 So I decided that when next we met I would tell him I’m a PLWH.  When I did, there was no shocked expression on his face but he had a sober look then he hugged me and was close to tears. I was like, “Excuse me, it’s nothing and I’m happy with my life”.  He asked, “Is it so that I won’t toast you that you’re telling me you’re HIV positive?” I said “No, I’m just letting you know before we get deep into this relationship so that if you want to back off now, you can back off.”  He said, in fact, this   made him love me all the more.

We started dating. He met my family and proposed to marry me. We married April 7th 2007.  Since we got married - wow, it’s been wonderful.  Niyi is a very caring man, and he’s loving. We’re happy together.

We are what is called a discordant couple – whereby the woman is HIV positive and the husband is negative or the other way around. Women are more vulnerable than men when it comes to HIV through sexual transmission due to the differences in male and female anatomy.

What has your experience been with antiretroviral treatment for HIV?

We have different kinds of antiretroviral drugs, brands, and doses. I’m on combivine (the combination of two different drugs: lamivudine and zidovudine) and nevirapine. I take four tablets daily – two every 12 hours. I started taking my drugs in 2003 - then I was at the stage of AIDS, though I was not bed-ridden. My CD4 cell count was below 150 (under the WHO guidelines anybody with a CD4 count below 200 is at the stage of AIDS). And my viral load was very high, so that was when I started treatment. I’ve never had any side effects, but other people have different kinds of side effects to different drugs. Some people react terribly to nevirapine. Some people are not on nevirapine at all, they’re only on combivine, which is not the right regimen – it’s not a full HAART (Highly Active Anti-Retroviral Therapy).

You don’t start taking ARVs on your own; you should consult your doctor first.  Before they start anybody on drugs, doctors do clinical baseline tests. Some people are HIV positive but they’re not on drugs because they don’t need it -their CD4 count is very high and their viral load is low. Such people are on multivitamin immune booster drugs.  They also have to eat well and treat opportunistic infections – likewise somebody that is on the drugs.

Antiretroviral drugs in Nigeria are now below N5000 for a monthly dose. It’s not everybody who can afford this - the majority of people living with HIV cannot even feed three times squarely. Poverty is a major problem.

Have there been discouraging moments for you as a person living with HIV?

There have not been any that I noticed, because I tell people that I don’t care to see stigma, and I don’t care to see your reaction. I don’t care what you feel about me, or what you think about me. I talk about HIV inside the bus, in these our local danfo and molue, and I put a human face to it. I tell people I’m a PLWH. I talk about HIV in airports – international airports – I’ve done it in Kenya! I’m not paid to do that. I talk about HIV whenever I get the chance to talk about it. I’m not bragging, but God has been seeing me through and has been helping me and supporting my family. I don’t depend on any person; I depend on God, so why should I worry what a man or a woman is thinking?

What does it mean for you to be “living positively” with HIV?

It means to have courage and to encourage other people; to have strength from within, strength to overcome every other obstacle; to have faith - faith in God, that with  Him  all things are possible; and it also means to have hope – hope to live for tomorrow. And because life is beautiful! I’m a happy person. Knowing my HIV status is the most wonderful thing that ever happened to me. I’m delighted that God has given me the grace to live, and the grace to touch other lives and make an impact.

What advice would you give other young people who have recently learned that they are HIV positive?

I tell them that they should hang on; they shouldn’t lose their self esteem because of HIV - that is not the end of the road. I will go back to what I said on positive living: they should have courage, strength, hope, and crown it all with faith. They shouldn’t see themselves as people who are dying, but live positive lifestyles by living healthily – eating good fruit and food and drinking enough water. And they should abstain from re-infection. The HIV virus has type 1 and type 2. I’m a person living with type 1. The virus also has sub-types A-G. And that is why getting a cure is an issue. So if I have a particular strain of HIV, you may have a different strain. If I keep on having unprotected sex, I may be infected with another strain from another person, and this could cause resistance to the drug treatment. 

What advice do you have for young people who are not HIV positive (or do not know their status)?

Well, if you’re not HIV positive, I pray you remain negative. If you don’t know your status, it’s high time for you to take a test. I advise young people that are sexually active, or that have been exposed one way or the other to get tested. Everybody is at risk! Even if you’re a virgin, you’re at risk, because you may have been exposed through tattoos, the piercing of ears, etc. Early detection and VCT (voluntary counseling and testing) are also very important. And when you go for VCT, from there you learn the 411 - the next steps. There’s treatment, there are support groups, and there are a lot of avenues to learn about HIV.  Young people should correct their minds, their misconceptions about HIV.